This product is made especially for you as soon as you place an order, which is why it takes us a bit longer to deliver it to you. Making products on demand instead of in bulk helps reduce overproduction, so thank you for making thoughtful purchasing decisions!
You probably already gave us your email, but you know what the heck, right? Might as well keep trying to put you on a list so that we can send you a bunch of really insightful and interesting marketing schemes to convince you to continue to buy our silly products that you definitely really need, right?
(Don't listen to your spouse, if they don't let you buy these they don't really love you.)
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